[ maybe that is what's most unsettling about all of this - that yennefer knows ciri knows more about her than she realizes. that ciri has a knowledge and understanding that yennefer herself doesn't have. it edges on uncomfortable, if only for the place yennefer had found herself before she'd met ciri in those dungeons. i've lived two or three lifetimes already she'd told tissaia, fully expecting, almost knowing that it would be her end.
and yet there was ciri, who had all of these memories, all of this knowledge, of a yennefer that she herself hadn't expected to exist. who was that yennefer that she knew so well? and why did she feel a constant itch that she was failing to live up to her?
yennefer feels her jaw tighten at the thought of it, at the way ciri's shoulder's tighten. ]
I don't pretend. [ she says, her tone not exactly sharp, but with the promise of an edge, if she needs to. yennefer can recognize the urge to be defensive, the way her body tenses in the seat, but she exhales another breath and looks at ciri.
she is not sorry for it. not for her reasons, or what she did. she is sorry for the fact geralt was a part of it, sees it as a mistake that she will not make again, and with all the protectiveness she can feel from ciri, yennefer can see echoes of geralt himself. ] But you asked me what the price had been for, and that is the truth.
[ and the worst part is - she's being honest. there might be more to it, might have other legs and other advantages and other things yennefer could get out of it, but the bottom line had always been ciri. the promise she made geralt. the promise she'd made herself, that first day in the cells. the spark. ]
no subject
and yet there was ciri, who had all of these memories, all of this knowledge, of a yennefer that she herself hadn't expected to exist. who was that yennefer that she knew so well? and why did she feel a constant itch that she was failing to live up to her?
yennefer feels her jaw tighten at the thought of it, at the way ciri's shoulder's tighten. ]
I don't pretend. [ she says, her tone not exactly sharp, but with the promise of an edge, if she needs to. yennefer can recognize the urge to be defensive, the way her body tenses in the seat, but she exhales another breath and looks at ciri.
she is not sorry for it. not for her reasons, or what she did. she is sorry for the fact geralt was a part of it, sees it as a mistake that she will not make again, and with all the protectiveness she can feel from ciri, yennefer can see echoes of geralt himself. ] But you asked me what the price had been for, and that is the truth.
[ and the worst part is - she's being honest. there might be more to it, might have other legs and other advantages and other things yennefer could get out of it, but the bottom line had always been ciri. the promise she made geralt. the promise she'd made herself, that first day in the cells. the spark. ]